Coronavirus: I Had a Panic Attack. Then I Asked Why.

Two nights ago I had a panic attack. Apparently, it lasted for 20 minutes, but it only felt like 30 seconds. First I had no mental or physical energy to do anything. Mom had come to the rescue. And she did with the simple touch of her hands (after obsessively washing them). Because that kind of love is unbreakable, especially during times like these.

I am totally OK by the way. In fact, after following the below suggestions, I feel fantastic. Anyways, back to the attack…

Once my brain slowly started working again, I asked why.

Coronavirus this past week

What I am about to write below will sound sad. But there is a good ending I promise.

• My Addiction to News: In the past week I had read maybe hundreds of news pieces on the COVID-19 development. It was almost addictive because I needed answers and solutions. I needed to plan. Plan for my business, for my child, for my husband, for my family and my future. But I couldn’t. No one knew or knows what is going to happen tomorrow so making any kind of plan is your best guess.

This is the kind of thing that no matter how smart and wise you think you are, you could be horribly wrong and it has nothing to do with your intelligence or experience.

• My Business: In the past week I also had to force myself to make some heart-wrenching business decisions. The conflict between my brain and heart was painful. My decisions required many meetings, many sombre talks, many second-guessing everything I was doing, over and over again. I was exhausted.

When you are responsible for paying over 20 people who work and contract with you and you love them so much, the last thing you want to do is to hurt them and cut them off when they need it the most. It’s horrible dilemma. And it sucks.

• My Marriage: In the past week I didn’t realize that both me and husband were on the edge. I thought it was only me and he was just being difficult. I didn’t realize not everyone communicates what they are feeling the way we expect them to.

• My Family In Iran: In the past week I had to speak to my family in Iran, one of the countries hardest hit by the virus. Except in Iran, the government doesn’t really help its civilians the way Canada does. Some people say they will not die of the virus. They will die of starvation. To say that about a country known to be so rich in its resources says something about the effects of this virus.

I can go on. But I won’t because what you have gone through in the past week is probably not too far off, if not worse than what you have gone through.

You are not alone.

More Contagious than Coronavirus

The thing about panic attacks is that they suck but they make you think. And if you can remain curious about them and try to learn where you went wrong, you can make some life-changing, positive decisions.

Not all of us get panic attacks though. We do get stress, sometimes anxiety. And the thing about anxiety is that is highly contagious. And during these times, we are not just getting attacked by a contagious virus. Our mental health is getting attacked by anxiety. And I think it is probably as damaging and contagious, if not more, than the virus.

We have all seen the long-term results of high stress and trauma that pass through generations. Such as the treatment of aboriginal children at residential schools. Any of us who has lived through wars has been humbled by the long-term effects of the mental toll it took and continues to take on us. Soldiers can have PTSD for the entirety of their lives to crippling levels.

This virus to me can be bigger than war or anything us humans do or have control over. Its impact on our emotional health can be catastrophic and last for generations.

Let me explain:

Loneliness Kills More than Coronavirus Does

Studies have shown that loneliness can be more deadly than obesity or smoking, and certainly more than the current fatality rate of Coronvarius:

• Researchers at Brigham Young University conducted an influential meta-analysis of scientific literature on the subject and found that social isolation increases your risk of death by an astounding ~30%, and some estimates have it as high as 60%.
• All people who commit suicide have one thing in common: they are lonely;
• Loneliness is directly related to depression, anxiety, dementia, substance abuse, even things like manic-depression and schizophrenia.
• Those who are socially isolated suffer from higher all-cause mortality, and higher rates of cancer, infection and heart disease.
• loneliness raises levels of the circulating stress hormone cortisol and blood pressure, with one study showing that social isolation can push blood pressure up into the danger zone for heart attacks and strokes.

Anxiety Can Eventually Kill You

Numerous research and studies have shown that anxiety can severely damage you in the following ways:

• Your Respiratory system: causes rapid, shallow breathing. If you have chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD), you may be at an increased risk of hospitalization from anxiety-related complications. Anxiety can also make asthma symptoms worse.
• Your Central Nervous System: increases the frequency of symptoms such as headaches, dizziness, and depression.
• Your Cardiovascular system: causes rapid heart rate, palpitations, and chest pain. You may also be at an increased risk of high blood pressure and heart disease. If you already have heart disease, anxiety disorders may raise the risk of coronary events.
• Your Excretory and digestive systems: affects your excretory and digestive systems. You may have stomachaches, nausea, diarrhea, and other digestive issues. Loss of appetite can also occur.
• Your immune system: if you repeatedly feel anxious and stressed or it lasts a long time, your body never gets the signal to return to normal functioning. This can weaken your immune system, leaving you more vulnerable to viral infections and frequent illnesses.
• Other effects
  • headaches
  • muscle tension
  • insomnia
  • depression
  • social isolation

How to Protect Your Mental Health During COVID-19

Plan, plan, plan:

Have a short-term plan. Have a long-term plan. Plan what to do if this thing lasts for 3 months, 6 months, 1 year or more. Make a list of what you will or have to do. Certainty is the antidote of anxiety. Create certainty in your life by creating expectations and plans.

I ended up making some solid plans based on my best guess. This became so comforting and so much better than being afraid to plan.

Hope:

The main difference between happiness and depression is hope. Stay hopeful because guess what, it IS going to get better. We just don’t know when.

Talk:

We are mostly social animals and self-isolation goes against our instinct. This is why we get depressed/lonely when we can’t socialize. Talk, in any way, shape or form you can.

Exercise:

Online exercise programs are plenty and can be done from the comfort of your home. I am expecting to gain 5 to 10 pounds by not being able to move so I will do daily exercising from today forward.

Grieve:

Cry your eyes out. You will feel better, that is what crying is for. Let your emotions out instead of compressing them up inside. You are already doing that to your body, you do not need to do it to your mind.

Help and Give:

The gratification from helping and giving is a feeling no money or success in the world can bring you. Help, and you will feel better.

Loving Kindness Meditation:

Harvard Business Review wrote an amazing article on how to deal with anxiety during Coronavirus through Loving-Kindness Mediation and I encourage everyone to read this article. 

My friend, stay both mentally and physically safe. 

Written by Leena Yousefi, March 22, 2020.