What to Know Before You Choose to Divorce in Surrey & British Columbia
Our divorce lawyers in Surrey know that there are many reasons people divorce. It is never an easy decision, and it is often emotionally overwhelming. We have all heard of or seen the dramatic retellings of divorce either in media or through a friend of a friend.
The air of drama and uncertainty of divorce/separation can result in rash or panicked decision-making. It is sometimes excessive stress that families are going through, and it is something in my practice that I work hard to mitigate.
To learn about eight tips on how to prepare for your divorce, click here.
Table of Contents
First, Legal Knowledge is Power
Divorce in Surrey and Canada is governed by the Divorce Act.
If the decision to separate has been made, the next prudent step is to seek legal divorce advice in Surrey. I cannot stress the importance of being informed of your legal and entitlements enough. Too often, families are in my office with misinformation or skewed perceptions of their family matter.
Family lawyers in Surrey are trained professionals equipped to handle these matters and have the most up-to-date information. It may be quicker and cheaper to Google legal questions, but the law constantly evolves. Each family’s circumstances are unique, and the often-generic information found online will result in more questions or incorrect perceptions of your rights. The generality or incorrectness of information can result in missing deadlines, severely hurting your case.
Read here to find the best divorce lawyers in Surrey.
Do Not Be Afraid to Seek Professional Help
It is understandable that booking a consultation with a lawyer can be uncomfortable or disheartening. However, you are taking control of your family law matter by doing so. Not only do you help yourself, but you are helping your children. Lack of legal information only breeds conflict in family law matters, and this only increases stress/costs for families – something I seek to mitigate for families.
Speaking from a gendered perspective, I often have women that come into my office feeling ashamed or worried about appearances for seeing a divorce lawyer. It remains my advice to anyone who walks in my office that being proactive is the best first step to take, and seeking professional help is nothing to be ashamed about or doesn’t make you the “money-hungry ex-wife”.
If I could impart any wisdom on newly separated families, it would be to ask questions from the appropriate professionals and do not feel afraid to have those difficult conversations.
Do Not Blindside Your Spouse
The hardest step to take in any separation is informing your spouse. It is a difficult conversation to have, but it is a necessary step to take. Families that are open in their communication often tend to have the most collaborative separations.
No matter how positive your relationship is, no one likes to be served with court documents, particularly when they did not expect it. Blindsiding your spouse in such a manner will only cause conflict – this is something I have seen too often. Conflict only breeds aggression, ‘win/lose’ mentalities, and stress; all these lead to higher costs.
After you have had the conversation, the next step for a family is to decide how to move forward in the process.
The Next Step is NOT Court, Choose Process Before You Choose to Divorce
I often see clients make the mistake that they think the next step is in court. Again, I blame the misconception that separations are had in courtrooms. In fact, this is the last place where families should be, and the next step after deciding to separate is to choose the process.
What do I mean by process? There are plenty of options for families other than court; such as:
You can resolve all issues related to your divorce without having to step inside a courtroom. The difference between a contested and uncontested divorce can be fortunes.
Choosing the process that works for your family is essential, and I encourage families to consider out-of-court settlements. I am not saying that these processes are any less difficult, divorce/separation are inherently overwhelming, frustrating, and stressful. There is no magic pill that eradicates that. However, out-of-court processes will help reduce the effects that often come with separation.
Once a process has been determined, this will guide your family law matter. Your family law lawyer will take the necessary steps to begin the process you choose. It is worth keeping in mind that you can change processes throughout the course of your family law matter.
Your family’s needs may change in the course of settlement, and that is okay. The most important thing is that you are informed have representation, and steps are being taken towards resolution as that is the most beneficial for any separating families.
Summary
If I could emphasize the key steps to take at the beginning of the separation process, it would be as follows:
- Seek professional advice from family lawyers;
- Consider the processes available for your family matter;
- Have those difficult conversations with your spouse; and
- Breathe.
Family law is our focus at YLaw. Consult with our dedicated Family Lawyers in Surrey to obtain more information on how we can help.
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This article is for information only and does not constitute legal advice. It does not create a lawyer–client relationship with YLaw or any of its lawyers. Laws and policies change, and information here may not reflect the most current legal developments. For full details, please contact us to obtain advice about your specific situation.